i am NOT doing that with my feet, or any part of my body
By the way the fattest man alive got married yesterday and I don't even have a boyfriend.
I got raped by $2 you call it's. I'm still hammered. And mentoring high school kids. My life is a joke.
Pish posh, there's never a bad time to eat food off my body.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she took her clothes off and my dick went from =====> to =>
we literally hit three floors of our apartment building searching for condoms. also got macaroni.
Something smells like weed and I think it might be my mascara. Come sniff my eyes
Look dude, you cant keep blaming everything on the new years party. Its february...
Found your pants. They were stuffed in the tank of the toilet.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Plus i lost a button on my shirt and we got free drinks all night. Sorry I'm not sorry.
Can you please stop fucking every bartender in the city? Just once I want to have a Jack and Coke without fielding questions about your availability.
She's asleep in a fisher-price toy car
Here’s how sick I am. I’m not hungry. I don’t want coffee. And I don’t want dick. So, you know it’s bad.
My apartment stinks of burning failure
What does "mood AF" mean?
Mood as fuck.
Why did you comment that on a video of a gorilla throwing its own shit?
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