There is something about drinking on a golf course and getting with younger women that just really makes me feel at home.
ugly people sure do ruin things
There's been so much talk around your vagina it's like a local celebrity
Oh my god it just tripped me out that I used to be a baby, I had to tell you.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
After he told me that it's up to him to carry on his family name, I almost felt bad for not letting him cum inside me.
I am not saying a eulogy for your vibrator.
Just got booked to do a bachelorette party for a polygamist wedding. And notice I only text you to rub things in your face and show you my life shits on yours. Daily.
Would be in best interest to sanitize the DVDs
No more morning sex. Just for once, my vagina would like to go to work bone-dry and bone-free.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Someone snapchat me a pic of you topless laying on the bar with Scotty pouring a bottle of tequila down your throat. IT'S NOT EVEN ELEVEN YET.
School starts next week
I thought it was improvement but then i realized sex isn't an emotion and I hate everyone
I never thought my gollum impression would lead to me getting laid.
Huzzah!
Man the amount of drugs being done at a wedding with a bunch of surgeons was disturbing
I think I fell in love last night
That guy had a face tattoo and was named Cheddar. Please tell me you’re kidding.
I'm sorry I get my lefts and rights confused because I'm dyslexic. But, it took you at least 15 minutes to figure out it wasn't your room OR YOUR HUSBAND.
Randomize