there are some really hot girls on the bus. i want to lips them
I accidentally had sex with my boyfriend's twin last night...and he didn't stop me.
How was it?
Fantastic, but that's not the point.
sorry probably not gonna make it :( kinda tied up right now
sad face, r u gay?... wait like really tied up?
:)
It was awkward until we both realized our obsessions with harry potter and sangrias were the same. Now were in love.
You need tk get a life and stop texting me about fictional characters. I don't give a shit.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Mango Malibu should win a nobel peace prize
He could tell i had a fever by feeling my tits. He gets docter of the year.
Ever find yourself wondering if your life is God's way of telling a joke?
Seriously. There are at least 10 other people drinking at the bar with me at 10:40. Im justifying it with the fact that I've been up since 5am.
Just gave a gay guy pointers on how to make anal not hurt. Reevaluation of life choices: in progress.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
her best friend is in town and she told me that they used to fool around when they were drunk and I'd have to "help keep that from happening"
you motherfucker
I feel like it'll be a success as long as she doesn't end up dead in a ditch. There has to be a line somewhere.
We found him in the neighbors shed using a bicycle as a blanket. We just left him there.
What drink are we having for lunch?
Whoever said it shouldn't take a man to make you happy clearly wasn't having sex everyday.
I just had a visual of u banging and screaming at him at the same time.
Randomize