Do you think you have hit the lowest point in your life when you find yourself actually condisering watching the movie "Gigli"?
it was so cute when you were pretending to have willpower
I have a voicemail from Mike at 1am. He starts to say something, but then throws up instead.
By the way, your roommate is right. His penis is much bigger than yours.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I Apparently saved a picture of the Eiffel tower in between 2 pics of his dick. It appears to be the same size. I fucking love Paris.
He likes Jesus. Game over.
Oooh wait, he just told me he was high.
I have Denny's hours of operations written on the palm of my hand....not in my writing, in a girls writing, is that as good as or equal to a cell number?
He's claiming he can open a beer bottle with anything. He's been trying for a while now with a power rangers action figure and he is just cutting the hell out of his hand. There is blood all over billy
Not every day do you see a hooker getting arrested at noon. Just kidding, we live in Reno.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think the best part was the fact that the stripper's lock screen was a picture of the virgin mary
Let's play "Guess What I Just Found In My Vagina?"
I wish everyone could suck his dick. It was an honor.
You told your family you're bi over the phone?!
We were talking about exes and it just came out....and so did I.
There's nothing like when u really click with a stripper
I'm not gonna plow a chick in front of her 14 year old brother....
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