it sucked. he totally couldn't get it up. blamed it on never having cheated b4. Couldn't stop laughing. fuck.
I said I wanted my dignity back. He brought my thong to me after sharpie-ing "dignity" on the front. I'm not sure if I should me mad or impressed.
I saw the video from Saturday. So, how much did I drink for me to think I was a duck and strip my clothes?
Do you know how hard it is to get cum out of a straw hat!?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just sat there and watched paula deen's face melt for an hour.
she kept yelling about wanting tacos, so I gave her a piece of bologna in a tortilla. she didn't know the difference
I drank entirely too much. My skin hurts to wear
honestly i just want a cigarette and someone to go down on me... are you interested in helping with either of those
he signed me a blank check so today i get to decide if i want to be a saint or a millionaire
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Best walk of shame ever. Wearing a bright purple onesie, covered in smudged childrens make up, carrying my shoes and 1/4 sac of goon. I swear every house I walked past had an elderly couple watering their garden just to watch me
Just bought a colored water bottle so my classmates can be so judgemental when I bring beer to class.
I don't need to marry the guy. I just need some filthy, shameful wish fulfillment sex and then live out the rest of my life on the bean farm.
I bought the restaurant a boat airhorn to wake up sleeping employees.
I love you
You wrapped yourself in tin-foil and told us you were Iron Man. I have pictures.
I'm going to use this quarantine time to improve my blowjob skills.
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