weddingsv make me drug and hornr
My kitchen smells like failed pina coladas.
You love popeyes more than me
does delicious chicken come out of your vagina?
I had a new years resolution not to be a whore anymore, but I think I'm gonna wait till 2011
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Oh shit. Easter I forgot. Maybe we should leave the illegal stuff for when Jesus is less present.
we usually just have an Easter beer hunt and never end up at church anyways
I would invite you but we are high and there is an AK-47. Not your scene.
He was like a foghorn with a huge penis.
I started singing the national anthem on a train in London. Happy 4th of July assholes
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm staying in tonight, it's my Christmas present to my liver.
and it seems i've caught your masturbating bug. thanks.
I just farted in the bathroom and the guy in the stall next to me started gagging. Its a beauitful day
Blocking me on Facebook doesn't change the fact that you've had my penis in my mouth. So there's that.
So I just noticed that my last drunk google search before going to bed last night was "ghosts based on gays." I have no idea what that's supposed to mean
To be honest, the last time I saw him he had a jesus costume on telling people to pray to his bible.
So he's at the chuch?
No, hooters.
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