Culvers...So Good
So good. The butter burgers slip right outta my ass.
When you told me you were coming to my show, I didn't know you were bringing Satan and Brokeback Mountain with you.
he was writing an apology letter to his liver in shakespearean english... That much fun...
I feel as if I owe my bloodstream some tequila.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
As I was puking last night I told them "it's ok I'm a paramedic"
Oh god. There is a bite mark in the bar of soap. Please tell me I was not that wasted.
he found you with your pants down, trying to straddle the urinal. no one should have to see their sister like that. ever.
Attn: you have now used your free, one time admission to pleasure town. Thank you for visiting I hope you enjoyed your trip. All future trips to P.T. Will cost you full admission price. We have different pricing plans to accommodate different situations, and remember it is more of a bartering system than a set price. Your patronage is always welcomed and once again thank you for visiting and have a fantastic evening.
I'm gonna have to get you a special blowjob bib -- like a lobster bib -- but instead of a picture of a little red lobster, it will have a picture of a penis, with 3 big squirts coming out.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Have fun in Vegas! Be safe, use condoms, and take a pic of Jon beforehand to give out when he goes missing. It will help the police.
I hope you get stoned and think that you're a seal in shark infested waters
You could totally spank that new found Catholicism out of him.
When you sleep in the bathroom, you're no longer a guest.
My professor just told my lab he could drive us around town in his 1991 Lincoln towncar limo for our bar crawl. This just keeps getting better!
She said to call her, so I called her. Her boyfriend answered and traced the fucking call. I could litterally hear him yell because it turns out he lives in 4d
Don't you live in 4c?
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