I may or may not have screamed I'M ON A BOAT while having sex...on a boat. I think I was born to have sex with him.
your all-time low pick up line was when you asked a girl "Are you rock-staring at me?"
I just bought a CD. I feel like a traitor to my generation.
the pub in dfw airport has a countdown timer to st. pattys day, to the second, i like texas
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If everything I've heard is true, then she's lost her virginity three times
if i find out your the one who pierced my belly button im going to fuck your sister again
I remembered to bring wine in a nalgene bottle, but I forgot sunscreen and water. I'm starting to question my life decisions.
I'm so bored right now i'm literally Googleing all the possible ways to get high with household items as my mom is sitting in front of me..
He's a Shit stain on my heart
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just found out i over drew my checking account on a 711 hot dog
Do u remember buying that
I remember eating it on the curb like a drunken hobo
She makes margaritas with lemon-lime 5 hour energy..thats brilliant
and you were wondering how she got into Harvard
Are we at that point yet where I can just say "I want you to sit on my face"? If not, want to go out for "drinks"?
He said he "doesnt care at all, really" if I shave my legs or not. Challenge accepted.
Hold me and let me compliment your butt
There's a guy masturbating in front of Sephora right now
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