I had just got her shirt off when I realized that I was about to fuck Chewbacca from Star Wars. The way she moaned confirmed that I was.
why would she cut her hair? she needs all the distractions possible from those texas-sized gums and horse teeth.
he came on my stomach and it was 1000 degrees in his car. i smelled awesome.
Definitely just blazed with the housekeeper. That woman needs a raise
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she reminds me of the first time i discovered masturbation. that's how you know it's true love.
Just saw my bank statement. It literally goes liquor store pizza place liquor store pizza place bar bar bar liquor store pizza place 711 for snacks withdrawl for drugs rinse and repeat
There's a point around the one and a half minute mark where the keg stand goes from impressive to pathetic
I hugged the bouncer as we left.
I mean like if I stood up my head might pull me down like an anchor
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Just took adderall with about half a bottle of red wine...i have stopped trying for this last exam
It would be awesome if I knew whose teeth these were in my pocket
These beer shits have taken over my entire life.
I don't want to get pregnant doggy style. That's sad.
And thanks! There are perks to polyamory. And birthday orgies are one of them
My face is going numb. I think it's time I call it quits
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