She is totes cute on her twitter. Which totally sounds like a euphemism for coot.
Just seen on a tshirt : "fake titties taste funny"
YOU GOT EVICTED FROM A TRAILER PARK!?!? WTF!!!!!
He just asked if I would make his black snake moan. Dating basketball players is not worth the glory
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It wasn't until like 4 and when we got off the phone you said god was summoning you back into the bar
Just in case you were wondering..... I really did just wave goodbye to you with my penis.
Also, I imagined that his bacne was bubblewrap and that made it much more tolerable
also please imagine me hopping a fence at 3am using two chairs. It was a shit show. K's guy practically ripped her off the top of the fence bc she got semi stuck. It was like watching Disney on Bud Ice.
The last thing I remember is crying and shaking my head as she was putting salt on my hand. I guess I took the shot
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I mean, unless you wanna just let me lie there while you fuck me and pour water into my mouth
I was at the pharmacy picking up my herpes medication and the pharmacist asked if I had any questions about my medicine, looked at the bottle, and laughed. Insult to injury man.
I ate shrooms on a frozen river in an ice fishing shack after a day of vics and beer and walked around on the river in a stupor. They made me bite the head off of a fish.
YO CONGRATULATIONS ON YOUR MÉNAGE À TROIS. YOU GO, GLENN COCO
Overheard a drunk girl talk about how when she's drunk she believes in more than one God
I'm really excited to meet your new dude! But we really need to find out if he's your cousin first.
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