KATE. I JUST NOTICED THAT LOWERCASE D'S LOOK LIKE SLIPPERS.
OMFG BINX FROM HOCUS POCUS IS MCGEE IN NCIS!!!!!!!! most. epic. realization. ever.
I could tell by the way he was holding my hand that he really liked you
I swear if it wasn't for meeting for drug dealers @ gas stations, i would never remember to get gas.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
well we could tame deer to let us ride on them. does that work?
I like to think of them as justice herpes. She cheats on me and gets more than she bargained for.
I picked the lock on the bathroom door and sang him a song while he pooped. Why is he mad?
I want to get business cards and hand them to hot guys and say " hey if you ever want to like makeout and pretend it never happened call me"
Like he held up the condom afterwards, twirled it with his finger, and said "look at that load"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
this new dose of ADD meds is totally being waisted with the unemployed new graduate thing if only I could add my hyper focused side effects to a coverletter
How likely is it that we can see each other tomorrow night? I want to shave my legs in good faith but it's cold outside and my bathroom is drafty.
I woke up remembering only that I got pulled over by a cop, then looked over and found that same cop, naked.
I just thought that if your brother was ever going to invite me over again, he probably shouldn't catch me fucking you in his bathroom.
I dont think the chain smoking, tequila shots or cocaine was good for my bronchitis.
They say you need two forms of ID, but in reality 1 nice set of tits works every time
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