I'm at the bar with Ashley what should I do?
humiliate her
like if someone fucked a dictionary but instead of having a penis, it was just one of those leap frog educational toys
I hope to god you are high
hey this is lauren, i have to type for jon because he's convinced the tongs he's holding are his real hands
i am only reminding you that showing off your fellatio skills on vegetables is probably not an appropriate party trick
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So I just used shazaam to figure out a pairs figure skating song. I don't think I could get any gayer.
What kind of person begs for a BJ from someone who just got their wisdom teeth out?
the black eye was caused by a 12 year old girl in a vampire costume who punched you in the face after you aggresively screamed "TEAM JACOB!" in her face & howled at the moon...
This girl would not stay down. It was like night of the living dead. She kept on rising up to haunt anything with a penis
When did we convert life to cartoon?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Lesson learnt. Sex toy cleaning spray is not an acceptable substitute to clean your glasses with.
I'll be the Broncos and you be the Seahawks and you can pound the shit out of me.
if it wasn’t 100% before, it is now that i will most definitely die a quesadilla related death
Somehow my family started talking about sex toys at breakfast.
I had to dust off the condom box before she came over..
Step one: We finally agreed on an au pair that we both wanna fuck.
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