Most awkward thing ever just happened. I was reaching in my purse to get something and a condom fell out into the woman's lap next to me. At least she knows I'm safe.
Did I miss anything?
A gay irish pirate, a caveman and hunter s tompson.
so we also did drugs
Maury Povich's contact info is in our database at work...i should steal it right?
thats the mark of a good guy. when you can period all over his leg and he still thinks you're beautiful!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My mom asked me to donate my child hood stuffed animals to the poor then I realized I was hiding liquor behind them. I told her I was too attached to them. She understood. Wrong in so many ways.
He shaved off his eyebrows. This is not my life.
Don't blame me for eating all the ham.. I gave it out to people, so at most I'm guilty of ham distribution
Your couch is like an animal shelter for stray drunks.
I woke up smelling like chlorine with a broke toe. They know how to fucking party on lake lanier.
I feel like I got ass raped in the brain.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
hey the jello shots wont freeze
How much Everclear did you put in them?
uhhh all of it
I will not be held responsible for my vagina's poor judgment.
Do to my newly discovered condition I'm having to resort to emergency beat sessions to avoid the temptation to text girls I know are easy slams.
Currently having to re-watch episodes of Lost that I've only partially seen because you distracted me with your vagina
Remember when we got high off our ass and you talked me into running in place then punched me in the face and said it was a wall?
Ya, you were bleeding for an hour and a half
Plus you need some new dick in your life, the environment is fucked enough you don’t have to recycle anymore 😂💀
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