Yes, I fucked her, no she wasn't that loose, yes she caused more drama than a 14 year old girl
Clearly, I'm already going to hell, so there's no point in trying anymore.
I swear if his heart was half the size of the cum stains he's left on my sheets we would have the perfect relationship
It's a self-perpetuating puke chain.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She just gave me a free latte.
Correction. She just have you a frothy, creamy path to that vagina.
Fuck your 100 proof Hot Damn. Do you know what 100 proof vomit tastes like? Anger.
I feel strange, like something is off with my body
Yeah that's called sobering up, we've been drunk for the past 4 days
Way too stoned bro. Was laying down on my back and thought for a good 30 mins what it would be like to be a turtle stuck on its shell
It's a sad day when you can't take off your pants and drink a margarita at work.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Surveying the reception hall and I'm fearing the worst possible thing that could ever happen...this might be a dry wedding.
.,.,you might have to leave
I managed to get through my meeting without throwing up in someone else's office, so there's that for an accomplishment today.
Wake up. Eat bread. Find your dignity. Don't be late for work again.
My car has a permanent smell of sex to it now.
It was extremely weird and uncomfortable mid blow job she looks up and says " tell me Simon Cowell makes your dick hard"
Fucked him in a graveyard. Need plan b.
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