God I can't wait to have my phone textbombed every night
he pushed my hair back because he said it made me look like kelly kapowski and he told me to call him zach
i hope whoever thought of bagged wine flip cup last night has the same hangover as me. not ok.
this is going to sound stupid but when I was drunk and thought I was a stripper where I did toss my pants?
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he sent me a winky sad face. i cannot deal this level of pathetically needy flirtatiousness.
...But it's not like we would be the first people to pay for an abortion with student loans and cell phone rebates.
Yes, he made a MIX CD for our booty call...
I was running around taking people's drinks at the bar and just dumping it into my Gatorade bottle screaming roofies.
my dad has now seen 6 different dudes grab my ass. i guess i should start a list.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Prop 8 repealed and I FINALLY got my period. Good day for America!!!
Ive fucked up. im like a feral dog rabidly chasing an infrequent dream amidst a cataclysm of disaster
Listening to The Little Mermaid soundtrack should cure my drunkeness right?
yeah the cops just showed up and they got there ass handed to them at beer pong.
Did you really have to freak out and get up half way through to put the cat in the closet?
...
we went to go have morning sex and I said “I was gonna put my mouth on it but you need to shower”#ruinedthemoment
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