It doesn't matter if they shave you or not, you're still susceptible to the staph infection.
Maybe I lied like you did about your herpes.
i guess i finally out drove tiger woods this morning..
didn't know how to tell his mom I was confused about how long we'd been together because we banged for a full year before making it official
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She clogged the toilet and got it out with a seven eleven bag. I tried to tell her no but she was convinced that was the logical thing to do.
I swear to God, if you drunkenly correct my grammar one more time, I'm cutting you off.
Handcuffs are allowed in carry on luggage :) just checked
But for real, I had the best sex of my life on that bunk bed
Drugs are gluten free tho, right?
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Night one million where I have madri gra beads around my neck and no justifiable reason for where they came from
Hey, if a dude can't randomly belt out Whitney Houston tunes from time to time, is life really worth living??
I'll never lecture you, go get that dick baby girl make momma proud,I didn't raise no quitter
Oh, and Harry Potter. We could be fuck-and-Harry-Potter buddies.
And then you screamed, "I JUST WANNA POUR MAPLE SYRUP ALL OVER HIM AND RAVISH HIS BODY!!"
Apparently we fucked, I kicked him out, then he came back and we did it on the coffee table and in the kitchen.
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