Ehh boy. FML. she was unattractively large.
Is your liver wearing a sombrero yet?
No...more like a life jacket.
i dont know whats so great about being respectable.
been sitting in chapter for 25 minutes. drinking last night's franzia out of a XXX vitamin water 10 bottle. recruitment chair has no idea. life is good.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just woke up on a dolphin floaty wearing only a party hat. There's blood on the side of the pool and glass in the sauna. Worst fucking hangover. But some guy said he is making crepes so its ok
today was the first day of rush. talking to girls all day makes me sick of having a uterus.
Call me pathetic, but saying "tits for ireland" is working out really well on chatroulette today.
She has never blacked out. I have tried to get her to so many times. Apparently it's a lot harder than we make it out to be.
Handcuffed. To. Steering. Wheel. Fuck.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Thanks for alerting everyone in our apartment what your one night stand's name is. Could you scream a little louder?
um so slept at robs. he woke up, looked at me, and said ' oh my psychiatrists are gonna have a field day with this one' I think that's when you know you can't hang out with someone anymore
For Valentine's Day I've purchased six lighters and I'm decorating them for him. I'm on a full ride to an art school and this is what I'm using my talents for. An intervention is needed. Please stop letting me date stoners.
I really want to lead this Amish guy into temptation
obviously he wasnt ready for this jelly and you can quote me on that
11/10 would buy him a McLobster
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