I'm listening to bach and watching porn,is that a sign of depression?
Quite the contrary. Sophistication.
I finally won that bet on when the anorexic girl would pass out at the gym. You owe me 10 now
Don't tell me wow. Tell me this is normal for college and in no way am I a whore.
This might sound awkward, but can I borrow a dildo for class?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I tried to show my boob for free volcano tacos at taco bell last night. Not boobs. Just boob. The manager wasn't allowing it.
All I wanted was a hug. You dirty, dirty whore.
You are my best friend, but sometimes best friends need to punch each other in the face
My mom just made me promise her that i'll care about the next guy I sleep with
So... crashing at the hot bartender's place is not a solid marital decision.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm over my straight phase. They all turned out to be idiots and none of them got me off. I'm going back to hot girls with strap ons.
Hahahaha don't tempt me. Remember we're trying to avoid airport jail if possible
Sexting is killing my work productivity but it's okay because I'm self-employed
He passed out before we could have sex. I had no choice but to use his boner to hold my onion rings.
Why did you have to tell me he has a hammer cock? Now I can’t stop staring at his pants.
Is it acceptable to bring pot to a funeral or am I going to have to do this shit sober?
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