why does hillary duff have a greatest hits album?
Call it a failed empirical study as to whether drugs would make her more interesting. or at least better in bed.
Ummmm yeah ..,.. All three girlfriends I have right now are chatting with each other at the party...... I'll see you on the other side
I was just referred to as 'the margarita slut' by an 11 year old.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm still waiting for my blazer that I left at your apartment, you owe me a blowjob for every day from Thursday on that it's late.
He left a trail of vomit straight from our dorm to the bathroom. Looks like we have our identities for the rest of the year.
Whoevers house this is has only beer and cream cheese in the fridge. Thats the diet im gonna go on
Please assure him that the flying penis statue is for display purposes only.
This holiday season is going to be rough between people coming home for the holidays and the already regulars on my list I might have to clone my vagina to make sure I get everyone for all they are worth
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
just woke up on my patio with a mouse eating cheetos off mys chest. youre all assholes.
Im not sure if the cops that just came are strippers or actually cops
He kept referring to my giving him head as a new level in our relationship and acting sentimental
You gave him a bj, not a kidney
Oh. My. God. It is NOT okay to drink Johnny Walker when there is no Jameson. My skull is eating my brain.
Plus my parents would be pissed if I spent Thanksgiving in jail... again.
No bra. No panties. Makeup from last night. At work right now. I am trash.
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