is it true guys wash their penises in the sink if they think they're getting laid at a bar?
it's more of a rinse.
Dude you called me last night to let me listen to you piss in a cup and drink it. Just making sure you survived
the only reason i even kissed her was because we were having sex when it midnight, and i heard people yelling "happy new year."
fuck you guys, stop putting fake babies in my car the cops came again.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the pharmacist hit on me as i picked up my herpes medecine. i think we found a winner.
Can you bring me a pair of sunglasses to the bathroom please... Don't judge me.
just got the results back. i love his dick even more now i know its clean
I tried exercising today. I ended up masturbating to the Wii fit trainer.
I am going to be fat forever.
I had something called a trashcan. Never again. I almost fucked chewbacca.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She kept looking at me and saying "you are the scary high".
There was an unopened condom by my car when I went to pick it up this morning. Someone may have fucked on the hood of my car last night. Don't think it was me but I can't rule it out 100%.
I mean, I would have, but I couldn't come up with a logical reason to bring up oral sex during an orientation.
It was pretty awesome. I drank out of a stein and attempted to dance to dubstep with some older guys in leiderhosen.
no, it was more of an i-don't-think-he-even-knows-what-a-clitoris-is, bad.
You can help me! We'll make an occasion of it. Have some rum, make some smores, condemn the email system to the pits of hell...
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