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I really hope you get sexually violated by a pterodactyl tonight.
sometimes i look at this picture of your cock before i go to sleep, there's something comforting about it
just took batteries out of my vibrator to play wii guitar hero. think i am gonna regret that move later tonight.
I felt like I was in a real life creepy Myspace message. "girl u cute" ... "girl u got a really nice smile"
My mom is getting really tired of hearing the excuse 'it's 5 oclock somewhere'
He told me the hand job I gave him this morning was "lovely".
all i know is that each time we woke up we were at a different chinese restaurant. help.
Somebodaw call 311 postw fire bunso on vietena floorwnkd
high as fuck. watching parent trap with my mom. keep missing my mouth.
Kid sitting next to me smells like he slept in a dutch oven full of farts. Going to die.
Would a ten year old streaker be inappropriate?
That's the stuff legends are made of
You know those creepy dolls that look like they are watching you from anywhere in the room? It was like that, but with his penis...
Put down the bong. Turn off Hey Arnold. Stop calling me football head.
I love you football head
How the fuck you gonna play love don't cost a thing in a strip club?
Hi this is the guy from the cell phone store. Your Dad just upgraded your phone as a surprise. I didn't tell him about your topless pics on your phone. I transfered them to new phone. Nice rack!
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