Aj just asked if we were going to the bulldog tonight..i told her no because of the expense and tests coming up..but mostly because i don't want herpes
i'm crying at olive garden. i've hit rock bottom
No she stopped screaming. Now she's eating popcorn. Off a plate. With a spoon.
drunk waterpark is besst waterpark.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Blood and glitter go together right?
don't trust your eyes. just sniff them. if they smell like axe, they are broke, move on to the next.
He came so hard he burst a blood vessel in his eye. Do I have to take him to the ER? because I'm too tired for this shit.
oh yeah, there may or may not be a large boa loose in the house when you get home.
Just had a talk about safe sex with my mom. Not about protection. About the very real possibility of a "penile fracture". Gotta love having a nurse for a mother.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If a girl called me a promiscuous philandering Casanova, should I say thank you?
Most definitely.
Ohh I see how it works, eat pussy and I get Reese's pieces.
maybe facebook could make a notification like "someone tagged a photo of that guy you used to bang and still think is really hot with his shirt off"
I JUST LIKE FLANNEL, NOT VAGINAS! OK?
I had sex with him in the back of my car in a duck onesie. I'm worth something dammit.
Unfortunately the rum ran out midway through our viewing and we had to suffer in silence for the rest of it.
Randomize