Just wanted to let you know that if you need my services as a male dancer for his birthday, let me kno so I can clear my schedule
Me too. Send a cab. Order food.
but i got with him after midnight so its technically 2 days
i find it sad that i can no longer sit in the back of class for fear that someone will fart into the heater again.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He just made me a heart out of cocaine... i think i'm in love
I don't know what he sees in her. All I see are horrible pancake nipples
Either I got the clap, or I masturbated with soap while I was sleeping.
I'm really stoned in my underwear. I probably won't make it to the bar.
Just got cockblocked by my GF's wedding shower... That's a first. And I have to buy a gift.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm going to miss hockey season. It was the best excuse to get drunk on a Tuesday night.
Hah I guess I sent that to like ten people, along with another one of me sitting in a bath tub eating an ice cream sandwich.
I just had a mental image of us riding a tractor through hell with one of those big guns mounted on top of it shooting at everyone while the indiana jones music plays.
looked up people from my old yearbooks. 3 ex boyfriends are gay. im getting drunk now.
HE HAS CHALLENGED MY BADNESS. I MUST CONQUER ALL THAT QUESTIONS MY POWER. BRING FORTH THE TIT PICS.
Speaking of, what are you doing next weekend? I'm going to a rope bondage seminar and may need a partner if my date bails.
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