Bristol Palin says: Remember to use protection
Bein cut off at a bar is embarassing ...until you get to the next bar.
Buying weed on Christmas. Gotta love Jewish drug dealers
so im gonna ask for shark week off tomorrow at work and i advise you do the same
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Everytime I see a couple on campus walking and holding hands I just want to yell he's gonna lie!
This is amazing. I can pinpoint the window in time that you lost all sanity.
In her drunkenness, she packed a bag with tequila, two shot glasses, salt, a knife, and two pears. She was prepared but too high to distinguish pears from limes.
Ryan got so drunk he gave a hobo $20 and I had to zip tie him to the bed so he doesn't out stupid himself
Lesson learned. Don't roleplay with a real knife.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
so as he was cumming he sort of growled with one eye squinted... for a moment there I thought I was fucking Popeye
im single, its not even nine am on Valentine's day and I've already gotten laid. suck it relationships
The number of threesomes I have agreed to seems to increase every time I talk to you drunk...
Throwing my sister a bisexual bachelorette party was the best idea ever. I made out with both strippers and the hot bartender promised to "gay marry" me if I take him as my date to the wedding.
The fact that u had sex with a Disney prince blows my mind, you're my hero.
He was out clubbing with his SON. WHY did you let me KISS HIM? Also WHERE WAS HIS SON?!
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