can a staight man not wear seersucker in this town?
been sitting in chapter for 25 minutes. drinking last night's franzia out of a XXX vitamin water 10 bottle. recruitment chair has no idea. life is good.
He just asked me if his big had a curved penis. Awkward? I think so.
hooking up with my manager sounds like an even better idea while i'm sober.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i don't even specifically remember last night, it's just one big wonderful lesbianic blur.
And dont tell me its his job to cockblock me just because he's my boyfriend.
hes out at the street wearing a tophat and a monocole and carrying a cane and greeting every car that drives by
he just went across the street and into someones house and we could hear him inviting them over from the front porch
Fun fact of the day: Our cat does not like rum.
I chugged vodka from a 15 ft snorkel. What the fuck did you do with your life today?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
THERE IS A GOAT THERE IS A GOAT IN MY BED IT IS EATING MY THONG WHAT DID YOU DO
He always tells me he misses my clit. I feel like I should make a drinking game out of it
Siri makes being stoned even easier. I don't even Have to type my texts myself
Though I typed a half of that one
Why does my jaw hurt?
I may have punched you.
But the real reason your aunt is drunk crying is because she has already had four margs and went for a 5th and someone is trying to stop her
kind of bad when u call a cop an asshole for driving you home from the bar
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