He's still on the phone with him. This is unnatural. Dudes don't call other dudes just to talk.
i have a reoccuring irrational fear i'm going to walk in on my dad masterbating. Night.
Waitress cut us off at Chili's bar. New low
i wonder what thom yorke's orgasms sound like
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The only problem is i have violated all potential new years resolutions at the new years party.
im not an educated person. i just do things. and it works out in my favor
I could literally track my booty calls if I ever got knocked up by my parking tickets
I keep hearing lesbian porn and I'm the only one home. I don't think this is healthy
No amount of marijuana is enough to justify blood on my ceiling
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I performed "get broken glass out of my shoulder" surgery last night... Drunk, with a what-a-burger straw.
All I really remember is thinking that the music looked like beautiful lizard waves in my head
It's a sad day when ur phone automatically updates u on Thursdays that traffic is normal and how long it will take to get to the bar
That's fucking great actually
Don't worry about me. I am infinite.
He spent ten minutes post bj, limp cock still out, in shock repeating 'best blow job ever'. So yes, yelling I am the penis queen out the car window was justified.
Legit hope my Trump humping Brother dies of this shit so I can stop pretending to still love him.
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