As a matter of fact my bong is named Hulkamania brother
I gave him a blowie and after he said he wanted to send a giftbasket to the girl we met through.
How was I supposed to know she would get offended when I asked her how long it took to draw on her eyebrows.
We made a drinking game out of Project Runway. Gay guys are so fun.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I made weed fried chicken. What have you done today?
The cab driver told me he hopes I look up to him as a father figure. Then he asked if I wanted him to take me to the hospital
No, that was the night I was sneezing out barf
My last google search was 'bulk asian wives' I don't know either
I want to pinterest what I want to do with my pubes. Why isn't there a board for that?!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We could have had it all. And by all I mean sex in your Toyota Corolla.
I wrote "fuck you meg" on my toaster strudel with the icing. I call it "passive aggressive breakfast"
I still think it's strange your mom saw me 93% naked with a Santa hat on and a raging boner. Tis the season right?
They're the one who can profit the most when given the opportunity for blackmail.
At least that's how I've always seen it whenever I've been the Designated Driver.
That simultaneously explains everything and makes me very very terrified of you.
I just told 2 of my vibrators "I love you." I seriously need some dick.
Just found out the last guy I hooked up with is being held in a federal prison under suspicion of stealing 175k.
Randomize