there was enough confetti in my bra to throw another NYE party
Yea. I think between making the bride puke, feeling up the maid of honor, and sleeping with a bridesmaid. I did my part.
Just saw a homeless man taking a shower in someone's sprinkler system....
Dude so coolest charity idea ever, think aids walk but instead of miles you drink beers oh the possibilities
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Boy did I ever crash and burn on the pickled egg pick up line.
Welp I just blew a load probably the size of a small pond if not a lake
Who the fuck is this
I went back to the party but by then they were all sitting on the floor in the dark listening to we are the champions on full blast.
Ok I am NOT pregnant. I could shove coal up my vagina and my uterus would turn it into a diamond in a matter of minutes
I just washed out an empty chocolate milk bottle to take whiskey on my bike ride.
You are not an adult
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's like wanting to be a vampire vs being a vampire. You don't know the cock lust until it's infected you.
I'm sorry but the visual image of you suffocating on vagina is basically hysterical
Simple revenge plan: break into his house and steal one shoe of every pair
His acid is intense dude. I was just over at his place laughing about the hole in the wall I was convinced was a cat
I paid for lunch, then he made a bunch of holes in my wall and destroyed my bathroom.
I swear we were drugged last night
We had a 130$ tab bitch. We drugged ourselves.
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