I feel like I'm in dance class right now
Dude, I couldnt get it up cause she said her parents were home...
ok, come over...I have doritos
he got instantly turned off in the middle of a blowjob when he heard the news "twilight beat the blockbuster record of batman"
the only thing i can think of after seeing avatar is "when are they gonna make avatar porn?"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Some guy just delivered flowers to my roommate cause he fell off a roof onto her at a party last night. I think they have a date tomorrow.
There're making snowcones with the leftover vodka from last night. This is not the time to be making up excuses!
I like to play this game where I try to reach orgasm before my bathtub overflows....lost tonight.
You tried to sit down... There was a distinct lack of couch.
It's gay pride, I'm in my EMT uniform getting more girls than your straight ass ever will..
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
TSA literally pulled two bottles of whiskey out of my bag. Once he saw the leopard print socks and the mickey mouse tank, he put it back in my bag and said "Have a fun trip, man."
We made out and he didn't grope me. I liked it. I felt like I was innocent again.
It's so weird fucking this kids aunt then going to the gym with him everyday, but my sick minded self loves it.
Good news, finally found someone who remembers Saturday night. Bad news, everyone in the bar saw your penis
He threatened my life and my car because I called you. Are you sure you never slept with him ?
She played the piano. I played the piano. She got on top of the piano. I got on top of her.
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