that girl last night was a 15
wait she was 15?
no like black jack not sure if you should hit it
I was totally willing to let her keep giving me blowjobs as long as she didn't think we were in a relationship.
I really hope your girlfriend didnt have your phone while i texted how much i loved doing it in HER car with you :x
she was pretty happy for someone in the middle of a herpes outbreak, how was i supposed to know?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There's still flour in my hair. And I don't even want to know what the neighbors think happened infront of my house.
No I can't cure herpes. I'm an EMT, not Jesus.
It's like a booty call, except its for tacos...and you're my brother.
6 beers, 3 orange crushes, & half a fire ball later & you get my alter ego.
We got to his house at 7am and two random guys were on the couch shot gunning beers saying we were late for the party
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i want to live in a society where a 20 year old can wear pigtails and not get them called handlebars, because i look fucking adorable in them.
I am having the most awesome nonsexual conversation about my vagina right now
I took out the emergency phone in the elevator and replaced it with a bottle of vodka. The game is simple, do a shot for the number of the floor you're going to. Best suggestion box tip ever.
Sorry for cyberstalking your dad.
It's Jesse McGoddamn Cartney, the whole world sings that shit
she just punched him in the balls in front of everyone and yelled "YOU SEE WHAT YOU MADE ME DO"
Randomize