Tell me exactly where it said it wasn't a unisex bathroom.
Pre-pickelized cucumber-hand invasion!! RUN!!!!!!!!!!
I'm cheering for the colts this year. I basically have to since my fake says i'm from indianapolis
...I woke up with a yo yo in my underwear...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Also, just grabbed a bunch of "tuxedo black" condoms. formal, anyone?
We had unprotected sex and she's eating life cereal for breakfast. The universe is telling me get the plan b for her
Just found my mom passed out in my bed holding a bag of wine. Not sure if I'm ashamed or proud.
Not even drunk me wanted to have sex with him. I kept intentionally hitting my head on the table behind me during sex till he said i was too drunk for sex.
We've been here 3 hours and the only 1 word answer she didn't give was the drink order. Don't think I'm getting laid tonight
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm pretty sure I got a cavity today due to how many times I've puked hungover at work.
He's in grad school at Harvard. I suppose that means my vagina is now smarter than I am.
being serenaded is actually kind of awkward 2/10 do not reccommend
Well, I'm most mad that he lied to you (about being married)...but the CAT THING IS A CLOSE SECOND
I'd climb him like a horny MILF spider monkey.
Her cop pants made me imagine I was riding a unicorn and by unicorn I mean her face
Randomize