Things I find upon waking: a gay man, a straight girl both clad in web bathing suits, a full bathtub, an empyt bottle of jamesons at the bottom and a scuba mask
I want to take you away to a place of dolphin rides and hot stone massages.
Made out with me girlfriend while she was peeing. all time high, or all time low?
I'm making a contract of things you're not allowed to put in my ass
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Something about a hand job in a car doesn't scream girlfriend
We decided we needed a drinks fridge in our bathroom.
Thanks for alerting everyone in our apartment what your one night stand's name is. Could you scream a little louder?
You grabbed her hand and started jacking her finger off. She was horrified.
Did it finish?
I woke up on your bathroom floor, i used your towel I found laying on the floor as a cape to get to your bed. I thought it would help me walk straight if I looked like a superhero
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
C'mon pople!!! THursday afternoon isnot gonna drinkin itself!!!
I'm so excited you texted me but I'm way to high to process it
If my birthday doesn't end with my panties hanging from a ceiling fan, I'm holding you responsible.
If youre worried about being stabbed, you probably shouldnt be there.
He ate me out while I stood on his bed drinking a Rainier.
Every time I look at him 'Relax' by Frankie Goes to Hollywood plays in my head. Is that weird?
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