I wish we could go back in time and find our best farts ever
So I just did the walk of shame at dunkin... A lady told me me I was really dressed up and I told her I was going to a luncheon.
i'm officially boycotting relationships. hello random hook ups and treating men like meat.
How much time is enough between masturbating and watching little bear?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I somehow ended up with a bottle of red wine in one hand and white in the other and would drink them at the same time. Ruined
Yes, but if I hadn't gotten here early, I never would have seen the butch lesbian midget waddling down stairs from the bar. Worth every minute of drinking alone.
I let him watch sportscenter while we fucked. How did he repay me? I'm now missing class to get a shot in the ass for the clap. You and I are getting wasted and keying someone's car this weekend.
Lucas & I had a photo shoot with her cape & I had child arm floaties on most the night.. woke up in a spiderman bed
Can't a woman sleep on the floor in her own apartment in peace without being judged?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I can dream in two languages, but it's still about ripping a bong.
I'm covered in glow paint and I can't find my shirt. So, successful night
He could only go twice. I need a guy with more stamina and is less married
I have a tattoo that says Yolo. You should not have been asking my advice in the first place
let me wake up, find my pants, and find out where i am tommorow and ill get back to you on that
I just wanna fuck your brother. Sorry if thats a crime.
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