Come on the kid is gayer than me
Like the straightest thing he could do right now is take it up the butt
I slept with him to see his dog one last time
All I remember is running out of the bathroom with one shoe on and the other in my hand. Pretty sure I was yelling as well.
No. If you are gonna end this, you are gonna do it right. Not by getting bombed and falling on a strange penis. That was the old you.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
A white limo full of drunken 30 something business people pulls up next to me and asks if they can kidnap me until 1030. If I don't make it back tonight, call someone and tell them I died gloriously
Rehydrating your liver back to life is never a good idea.
Going through Bojangles drive thru chanting "KFC" hammered at 8:00 was the highlight.
THEY AREN'T MARRIED. PUT ON YOUR HOMEWRECKING PANTIES AND GET TO WORK. NO EXCUSES.
For Halloween this year I'm going to paint myself in gold, wear a golden toga and sash saying " cunt goddess"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's pizza for people who hate themselves. I rang the place up once i'd finished and told them if i was on death row it would be my last meal because by the time i'd got half way through it I would be begging to die.
But then I ordered two more because it was 2-4-1 and my life is a mess
He shattered his pelvis base jumping so his dicks out of commission for 4 months. Your up, second string.
she paid $15 and a box of cheerios for their acid
You ever feel like just rubbing your face in everything like a dog?
Ya apperently its not "appropriate" to fuck in the school auditorium
I trusted a fart in Toronto. NEVER TRUST A FART IN TORONTO.
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