Not only is chick snoring like a 48 year old man but she's farting in rhythm
i was having this nice romantic moment with my girlfriend. then jimmy came in and peed on the fridge
So they call this "a walk of shame" but fuck that...this walk is fantastic. What kind of debbie downer came up with that name?
Best feeling in the world? holding your pee all day for a negative preggo test
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Actions speak louder than pants.
All I heard was "You have collect call from Lafayette Parish Jail for Dude it was awesome! I'll tell you about it later!"
He's Hawaiian. Thank god it wasnt a real American
he will always be the guy i fucked in the hallway.
you can now officially say a girl has shaved your initials into her pubes. welcome to the club.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think having a vagina should be considered a skill, give me a break.
Just used my eyelash curler to open a bottle of cider...
I think weed is turning my hair brown
He also reminds me slightly of a pirate which i find strangely attractive
Was i rolling around in a parking lot last night
My apologies. I'll try not to let my dick interfere with official work duties in the future.
Randomize