At least we don't have one night stands
True that. We sink our claws in our men.
I really wish i had a penis so i could dick slap that bitch right now
he just booty called me in advance instead of waiting til 3 am when hes trashed. i think thats really considerate and gentlemanlike.
I feel like I'm one of those people who someone looks at and thinks "how did she get into this college"
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Yeah, you spent an hour in front of the mirror trying to reenact the Sailor Moon theme song.
theres gunna be a new season of 16 and pregnant on mtv...WHERE DO THEY KEEP FINDING THESE IGNORANT PREGNANT GIRLS
Why does he only make me orgasm when I'm about to break up with him?
Okay I woke up in my room, snuggie on, had a water bottle in my hand my tv was on Disney channel and my cigarettes are gone. And I deleted every text in my phone but one that said 'you are absolutely welcome'
we fucked while standing on a ladder. challenging, but worth it.
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He found my weave.. Think he'll still fuck me Friday? And how do I ask for it back?
You know it's a good party when even the dealers were too fucked up. Just found and counted 140 E pills I found in a bag in the couch. Just paid for weed this month.
I couldn't think of the word "bath" so instead I told him I was marinating in soapy water
Did we seriously just get into a fist fight over kit kats?
I think my sex life is about to turn into a war on two fronts
I will run into the sunset with a fist full of condoms.
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