I hate bills.
Like ones you have to pay or people named William?
yesterday i saw a blind man guiding himself into a NYC tour bus... and i thought i waste money
soo apparently i was out of money so i stayed in the bathroom for an hour-ish passing out paper towels for money..needless to say i got kicked out
I need to surround myself with more reliable stoners...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she went to pee and i could hear her singing "Drip Drip Drop LIttle April Showers" from Bambi through the door.
I call it my summer of slut; except summer lasts from May until December. It's been incredibly successful
when your 30 and im 37 and we're lonely and single, lets make a pact to murder each other.
She just walked up to him and was like "you should fuck Angela" and it worked! She is the ultimate wingman
I can't believe you didn't come out. There was a duckling ON THE BAR!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Judging by his bulge. This guy is going home with me. Who doesn't want a dick that looks like it used to be a pillar in Rome.
At the end of the night i was really thirsty and tied to a bedpost
I never realized how weird our shower smells until I cracked a shower beer and had a familiar aroma to compare it to.
I am at a point in my life where I don't want to brush my teeth for my tinder date because toothpaste and martinis don't mix.
Pretty sure we're going to get a cease & desist notice from the Make A Wish Foundation, but until then...
Just heard a 15 minute program on the radio about how cases of gonorrhea in the throat and rectum are skyrocketing in the US. Almost crashed laughing so hard.
Sorry, who is this??
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