I just google mapped his house on satellite so i can really see how much money he has. Does that make me shallow?
I was just walking through Burbank and saw a hobo using solar panels on his shopping cart. We must be in trouble if the hobos are researching alternative sources of fuel...
Come on the kid is gayer than me
Like the straightest thing he could do right now is take it up the butt
Remind me that when I'm pregnant, I should NOT post vaginal dilation updates on my facebook. Ever.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i dont care if it was her birthday. if she leaves me with a half rack of budweiser and her boyfriend obviously shits gonna go down.
You hit on my mom and then passed out in the kiddie pool.
I just remembered that he had fake blood all over his face last night. I woke up with it all over my dick. He was 50. Please don't judge me.
let's remember the whole point of NYE: to drink antisocial amounts of antisocial drinks, become incoherent, ruin a carpet, talk to a tree, wake up with head sellotaped to toilet. The where/how is superfluous, my vote goes to a cupboard and a bottle of jaeger Questions?
I mean it was like cry my eyes out or masturbate in my moms bathroom.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
well in the interest of full disclosure I have been using a used kfc spork as a buttscratcher for a month
These welts and bruises from letting gay boys whip my thighs last night are a clear indication i should lay off the tequila.
Her parents are celebrating she found someone so well endowed.
Will there be champagne when they see the pay check?
We just catapulted a jelly bean off of his hard dick into his mouth.......Happy Easter!
It's the first weekend of the school year and I'm already selling stuff for booze. Need a microwave?
she glued two packs of googly eyes on you while you were blacked out. We talked her out of using her hot glue gun.
ummmm thanks
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