I just walked by a ginger with a mullet. I repeat GINGER mullet. So help us God.
Oh shit. I just had to lure him into the bedroom so I could take the list of his negative qualities off the fridge so he wouldn't see.
I took an adderall but just ended up meticulously arranging my farmville for hours
dude i woke up in a pile of chocolate chips. this has to stop happening
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he doesn't care that i have a boyfriend so why should i?
logic in its finest
Day 3. Will have to postpone job hunting by a month. May have blown out my knee. Was sunburned on Friday. Now look painted red. Still alive. All worth it.
i'm not entirely sure that 'not getting kicked out of the bar until it got dark' really classifies as 'doing better'
There is a large, jolly black gentleman in the parking lot of my appartment complex yelling about 5am jelly doughnuts. I want to be where he's at.
Ikeep having to ask jim if I'm actually talking. I canmt feel my body...this is what Christmas is all about
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You crossed every boundary on the boundary spectrum last night. You're like the illegal immigrant of drunk actions. No more holiday drinking for you.
I'm not driving across town for three thrusts and an excuse
Oh and no more ball pics to my family. Got in a little trouble over that. They have no sense of humor.
I just blacked back in and I'm at a kids birthday party in a suit and people are calling me uncle Carl. Never having your homemade liquor again.
Also my roomate used some of my condoms so she gave me her hummus. Great trade
I’d say they were worth it. He screamed “your tits are fanfuckingtastic!”while he was cumming
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