She was sleeping without a shirt so I thought I wouldI sneaked a peek at her nipples..than I realized they were just warts...on her back.
trsut me youll find me, im the only kanye west here and every1 is chanting dbag at me
you started whispering 'the itsy bitsy spider' while you were putting your hands up my shorts.
Please tell me the foreign boys in the kitchen this morning were yours.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Threesome in a minivan. New low
If shame burned calories, I'll be back to my birth weight by the end of this weekend.
The only thing I remember is vomiting and then feeding my dog a Mcdonalds cheeseburger and telling him yolo
Well, that now makes it the 4th girlfriend in a row to cheat on me. I don't even care anymore...I'll date a prostitute and not even worry.
We can put you in charge of something
I can be in charge of being more wasted than anyone there so everyone feels comfortable being ridiculous
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He's holding a pee stick. Yes it's weird.
I just connected with one of your drug dealers on LinkedIn.
He was tripping his balls off and kept aggressively saying SIT ON MY FACE. 5 hours and countless orgasms later I've decided I must never let this man go.
I need to show you how I feel about you by fucking you repeatedly.
He just blew a .079. Jesus loves him THAT much.
Look get the dick out ur mouth and answer the phone
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