just saw a dude in a v-neck sweater on a bike drinking starbucks. way to feed the stereotypes white dude.
Whoever said drinking more helps a hangover didn't drink 96% of a fifth of whiskey last night. This is absurd.
Why is there 6 cases of kwic trip dounuts dumped in my bed? Best 34 dollar wake up of my life
While I was dancing with him in my foil dress he said, "You're like a Chipotle burrito. Don't worry, that's the best complement you could get from me."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The savings from $3 shots still doesn't add up to plan-b
My professors need to stop cancelling class. Bad things happen when I have too much free time on my hands. Bad things.
I just stood next to my childhood self. Fuck, I'm really stoned...
Ughhhh. Finnnneeeeee. I'll have sex with your brother. Sheesh. The things I do for you woman.
Look if 10 am was too early to go barrel tasting the winery would not be open.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He has what he calls a "Ben Franklin". It's a pubic hairdo based on the man himself; long on the sides and bald in the middle.
Because my vagina is Ellis Island. All foreign penises must be presented for inspection and competency. God bless America.
She's hot and all. It's just I don't want to become Eskimo brothers with my sister
I told him you forbid me to sleep with him so he needs to accept that.
She passed out in my baby sister's room so we put her in one of my grandma's diapers, put a pacifier in her mouth, put her in my sister's crib and took pictures.
you walked into the party, and all you had on was your left sock... literally.
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