i'm really high, and this is sooooooooooo important. how many frosties does it take to fill a bathtub?
So she is eating her margarita with tortilla chips....like using her chip as a spoon
so, not only did she give him head while i was asleep next to them, apparently, it was bad head...
Are you serious?
yeah... as often as she does that, you'd think she'd be good at it...
I don't know if this beer pong partnership can last if you refuse to look me in the eye when we make sweet sweet clutch cup at the same time.
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This escort grabbed my boyfriends ass and it became clear, he fucked pretty much anything he could find prior to dating me.
We've started doing pot butter shots. WHY AREN'T U HERE
apparently "preggers as fuck" isn't an appropriate way to describe someone...
The cops said we could pay $250 or spend the night in jail and get 2 free meals. I might pee in mail-boxes more often
i was mezmorized. she was the most beautiful girl that looked like a boy i ever seen
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The chick working the drive through at BK on New Years stuck her head out the window and told me there were no line ups for the bathrooms inside so i should go in there. I just kept squatting and peeing and told her it would prob help business.
Although I am concerned about who made the decision to let you loose in a bridal show I am proud to see you in a sombero again.
I swear god is testing me by giving me awesome guys with tiny penises
I know. It was just so disappointing. I almost made it. And now the "when's the last time you peed your pants" clock has restarted. Lol
If you wake up, and some of your hair is singed off, it probably has something to do with the lit cigarette you put in your hair. You said it could double as a bobby pin...?
Don't EVER mix a flaming shot, with a Jello shot.. As good as it sounds flaming Jello is not a good idea
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