Food network will be on but we won't be watching
O by "watching" I mean "background noise"
his prince albert piercing just severely cut the roof of my mouth. can you pick me up at the hospital if he drops me off?
Making out with married ex girlfriends: priceless
Just turned elections for the sorority into a drinking game. Right on.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He invited me to see "alison wonderland" WHAT THE FUCK THATS NOT A FIRST NAME/LAST NAME TYPE DEAL
hot twin vs twin who's good in bed. why do my life choices same way unfair
the beer staff turned into a beer spear way to quickly
French people screaming and throwing stuff out the window. We told the manager and he's pissed and going up there. This is gonna be like cops. Maybe better than cops.
So I found "Fat chicks in saran wrap" in my search history.
That's all you talk about when you are wasted.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just living on dreams and a bed of used condoms
The majority of the reason I want to get my pilot's license is so I can use the argument "FUCK YOU! I'M A PILOT!"
Just fyi there is a naked girl somewhere in your house. I woke up and she was gone, definitely left her clothes tho
What started out as a one night stand ended in him texting me the next day, saying he thought he was gay.
He's teaching me French for free and I'm giving him blowjobs. Win-win.
What conversation warrents "penis" in rainbow comic sans
Randomize