I didn't talk to you tonight because I've decided you look like a man.
Then she called me a home wrecking whore.
dont they live in a condo? that doesnt count.
all i seem to do anymore is lay around stoned, naked and eating mangoes
I think she's a little more wasted than usual. She just crawled on the floor to tell mom it was time to take a shot.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
things I have learned from cosmo today- 40% of guys are uncircumsized, you can have a beer facial, and i really need to get tested for std's
he had a dikembe mutombo jersey on, was swatting peoples drinks out of their hand and wagging his finger in their face everytime he did it.
dude what did you give her she's eating her pocket lint
We had sex in the tent after his 6th beer and while we were at it we had conversations with the people outside the tent.
I think it's safe to say taking shots on the way to the emergency room was rock bottom. We're going to need to think of ways to top that between now and next new years eve...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Does taking an old homeless guy to the strip club, buying him lap dances, and calling him pops all night count as a good deed???
Can we put this graduation on the shelf figuratively and go drink
I couldn't drink enough to fuck the friend, you said challenge accepted and stole some chicks shot.
when I woke up, he was drunk and singing "soft kitty" and petting my face
I don't remember... but I heard a cop threatened to pepper spay my dick
So if I run into you on the street, I'm supposed to just stop drop and suck your dick?
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