I got my nipple pierced! I love it so much!
Well, there goes breastfeeding.
She invited me to an Eagles game, I mean that is almost better then if she told me she could only function with large amounts of semen in her system at all times.
My vag wants to play a game of hungry hungry hippos with your cock.
Just saw some girl biking on campus with a babyseat on the front. Baby included. Do you know how many points that'd be worth?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just won 10 dollars from out chugging the bar tender and I found out that the baby aint mine in the last hour. I don't even care if l get laid tonight any more.
tequila makes me forget i have legs
i just added your friend Valery on the FB just to comment on your tits.... thought id give you a heads up
I'm using my ex boyfriends dog to find a guy at the park I could see fuck buddy potential in. I'm the queen of irony.
It mathmatically balances. Less pants + more shirt = fully clothed. see? Not a whore!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ahh good point. I got some interesting mental pics and I'm slowly entering a "fuck it, lets do weird shit" phase sexually, but you may have already figured that out since I've been fucking you sideways and upside down a lot lately.
You are hereby uninvited from future Turnt Tuesdays until further notice.
After last night I never want to be in the back of a cop car again. No leg room.
But what if there are 6 people and they end up just pairing the off into 3 couples. Is it still an orgy?
I have beer and butt plugs...pretty sure I will find a way to entertain myself while I wait
I'm drinking because I just started here and every single person I work with wants to quit and when I asked a coworker how she's doing she literally just started crying.
Randomize