I think I just was a dick to Paul Rudd.
Alex, there's no such thing as a fancy sex store.
dude i dnt kno how, but i think theres a tampon in my butt
Katie Perry lied, you can't just wake up and shake the glitter off your clothes.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm currently bartering with this guy so I can fuck his bi girlfriend. We're at 5 pizzas and he gets to watch us make-out.
She kept biting his ear when he was talking to people, that was only 3 drinks in...
I saw you eating fruit and doing shots off people passed out
You know what, I don't care that I got too drunk and didn't make it into the boat party. If I had, I probably wouldn't have peed on you later while we soundly slept. I feel you need that in a best friendship.
OH MY GOD I CAN'T WAIT TO BONE YOUR EX BOYFRIEND. HOW AWKWARD IS THIS?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Update- I sold my hat to some drunk kid for 50 bucks. I used my earnings to buy beer on the way home. I realize to everyone else seeing me drinking on my balcony at 6am, I look like an alcoholic, but I'm thinking of it as a night cap
She is currently expressing her joy for "bad to the bone" through interpretive dance...
I just went into a strangers house to have a spoonful of sugar to cure my hiccups, wtf is wrong with me
Is it weird that I'm smoking a cig on my back patio in a sports bra and underwear?
Where do you think black out memories go?
Into the dark abysmal abyss of the deepest, darkest part of your mind. It's obviously the bodies natural defense to protect you from witnessing the shit you do while actually blacked out.
I climbed on the arm of the futon, flapping my hand fan frantically and hissing imprecations at the smoke detector
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