i hate this light. i wouldnt even hook up with me in this light
Holy jesus god. My teeth taste like street.
how the FUCK am I supposed to macarena while doubble fisting?
As soon as I saw the video camera and red light on, I started rolling my eyes when he would put it in me and telling him maybe his dick was too small cause I didn't feel anything...trust me that tape is going nowhere
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This is drunk me apologizing to sober me in advance.. I am sprry about you're trashed house. Mom an dad will be home by 5 so get up and clean. P.s. Mike is in the closet passed out.
He just did a 33 second keg stand with a fractured leg, busted chin and chipped teeth from running into a parked car after winning a race.
I got a Luke Skywalker costume so I can go do battle with the homeless guy who plays the fiddle dressed as Darth Vader downtown.
Come over so we can hookup and eat tacos. Those are 2 things you can't possibly turn down.
Really?!? Does he think blocking me on FACEBOOK means that he doesn't have a kid with me?!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That bitch makes my crazy look like a walk in the park with cotton candy
if any part of your body has ever entered my vagina you are fucking obligated to speak to me if i so desire
So doing the math I dated almost 2 of me in penises. Like, if I you layed them out lengthwise it would be 2 times my height.
Would it be weird if I bought knee pads and shin guards to fuck in my car?
I got the beer and the first aid kit. You get the tequila and burn cream. We should be set for the camping trip.
I'm sorry but it's something you and your A cups wouldn't understand.
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