Sorry, its so late. Remember your fat friend with huge boobs. i need her number..its an emergency
One of my students just wrote an essay on how ninjas, like drug addicts, must realize they need help before they can get better...I gave it an A+
I woke up this morning and the first thing i saw was the harry potter tattoo on his left butt cheek.
nothing this campus sells is worth it. not even sex.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Someone just asked me to go to the dining hall for dinner and he will use one of his swipes to pay for my meal. i think this is a college version of a date
Never underestimate the healing power of vomiting and a bath.
i figure i've seen his cum stains on the floor, i'm allowed to say these things.
You were Q-tipping mashed potatoes out of your ear.
You are such a cockblock sometimes
You NEED a cockblock sometimes
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Until this weekend, a man hadn't made me orgasm since the night Obama was elected. Now THAT is change I can believe in.
Last week in my political science paper I quoted the Mighty Ducks. This week, I compared the Constitution to a weird pickle law in Connecticut (by law, it's not a pickle unless it bounces). So, yeah, clearly I'm ready to be back to being a college student.
Someone explain to me why I woke up to find a stolen shopping cart in my room...
long story short... we may or may not have lost your car.
It's been THREE DAYS. Why do I still have the munchies?!
She called and said she was waiting for me naked. I got there and she was in ratty sweats, sitting in Nick's lap, with divorce papers. Needless to say my night was shitty.
Randomize