My cock was attacked by outdoor plants
I don't wanna hook up with anyone from minnesota
everybody there reminds me of mashed potatoes... white and lumpy
i got excepted to unl lol
You mean "accepted".
You lit the bowl with a rolled up paper towel that you ignited on the stove.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Thank you for the breast cancer awareness themed circle of death. Had it been any other time I would not have played topless.
Puking green right now......... jaimison mcflurry very bad idea
Can you give me a hickey quick? Im going to a white trash themed party. Completely serious
It says a lot about how well I know you when I can understand messages of yours that say things like "sauteed Jesus."
Welp, I can cross "making out with a guy in a dress" off my bucket list...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sorry about flashing you in front of your mom.
The worst part about living in a small town is partying with your pharmacist and then having to buy Plan B from him the next morning.
Not sure when or why this happened but I just stopped giving a shit about everything
So i had a lucid dream about blowing myself. This is why people love me
Damn. Looks like nobody I know is doing anything interesting. Guess it's another slut-it-up-with-strangers sort of night.
I learned tonight while in another country that no matter the nationality, men are disappointing in bed
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