I thought she was going to get passionate and throw her on the bed and fuck her, but she just started breaking stuff.
That's the thing about women.
I can tell how much and what I drank by my morning shits
One minute shes telling me about her volunteer work then she whips out a 12 inch dildo
My niece just threw up all over me. My sister's breastmilk was on my face. This is like a fucked-up porno gone terribly wrong.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He fell and asked for a beer and a band-aid.
HE GOT FOURTEEN STICHES
bro your seconds weren't very sloppy last night, is everything ok?
My code for I need help will be if I'm holding a bud light lime..
Just seen a chubby version of you. Nearly kidnapped her. Perfect woman
Girl in my public speaking class just gave a speech on weaves, God I love community college
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
if jesus wore shoes made out of pure flavor and hurricane kicked u in the face thats how it feels to eat pizza bites right now
I tried to breakup with him by telling I had a threesome. He one upped me by saying he had a 5-some so I couldn’t do it.
Saw throw up in the parking lot at work, glad I'm not the only one. But now the search begins.
Mary's wearing shades at her desk, brilliant!
LACE UP YOUR GODDAMN SHOES
N O
I cannot believe I am seriously having a conversation about my best friend's sexual prowess as a dream lesbian.
You don't make any sense
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